1940
by Wickedlovely01
Summary: They met in the Warsaw Ghetto. Their love blossomed in the Warsaw Ghetto. This is the epic love story between Magnus Bane and Alexander Lightwood, and it is filled with heart-wrenching, fluffy, and sad moments. 6 IS UP! Holocaust. AU. AH.
1. 1

**A/N: I want to explain something about this story. Many dates may be off, because I am not a holocaust survivor. I'm not even Jewish. I get the dates and the names of things from books and movies that I've read and seen. I had to change Magnus's family a little, so I changed his mothers personality to fit the plot. Alec will not appear until chapter 3 or 4. Anyways I hope you enjoy!**

* * *

My name is Magnus Bane. And I'm going to tell you a story.

The year was 1940, and I was 18 years old. I had a Jewish mother, whose name was Sarah, and a Jewish father, whose name was Jacob. I was an only child, but my life was good. We lived in Poland my whole entire life, and we were very rich and very well known throughout the Jewish population. This, perhaps, was what saved me from starvation in the Warsaw Ghetto in my teenage years. My father wanted me to become a rabbi, but I was not overly religious in that sense, and neither was my mother. I remember celebrating both Hanukkah and Christmas with my Catholic friends over the winter holidays when we were on break from school. I was a very smart student, my strongest class being history. Honestly, looking back on it now, I could've slept through that class and still have gotten an A. My house had a spacious backyard, with a magnificent view of the forest that seemed to touched the sky.

We had three floors, excluding the basement. I realize now that I was a very lucky child indeed. My room was very large, with pictures of posters that spoke the printed words of a new movie, or a signed autograph card of a sports player that I liked. When I was a child, I often pictured myself being something that would make me famous, not some Jewish figure who wore drab clothing and gave boring speeches that had me asleep within 5 minutes. My father dragged my mother and I to the synagogue every Sunday, saying that the experience would be good for my young mind. I believe he just didn't want to look like a fool to the other Council members.

I had many friends, but also countless enemies. Ragnor Fell, a hebrew boy with olive skin and dark brown hair, was my best friend. We often played chess over the fire on a cold winters night, eating my mother's homemade cookies. He would not surivive the Nazi's reign. Then there was Catrina Loss, a beautiful girl with almost white hair and pale skin. She was Catholic. I do not know what happened to her after the war. We went ice skating over frozen ponds many times as friends. Sebastian was a cruel Catholic boy, with blond hair and dark eyes that were almost black. His wicked smirk had often wormed its way into my dreams when I was in the work camps. Sebastian had pushed down in the hallways because I wasn't like him. Camille was my off on girlfriend for two years, from the time I was thirteen until I was fifteen. I remember the conversation my father and I had when I was given the most opportune luck to meet Miss. Belcourt.

"Son," My father said, his hands firmly clasped on my shoulders, showing me the form of Camille. "This is Camille Belcourt. Isn't she pretty?"

"Yes." I lied. She was pretty. I just didn't like her. Her platinum hair hung in lush curls around her sun kissed shoulders. Her eyes were green like emeralds that shined in a dark cave. "She is very pretty."

"Mr. Belcourt" Oh. Another set up date. Jacob had been planning these things for years, and it only made sense that he'd want me courting a girl of another Jewish member of the community. "has graciously invited us to his party next weekend. Camille has asked for you to be her guest of honor. Isn't that wonderful?"

I felt like I was going to be sick. I looked at my fathers lower face, not daring to look him in the eyes. I hope my features showed something of pleading. I didn't want to go through with this. I loved crowds, but only when I was with who I wanted to be, which only included Ragnor and Catrina. Not some barely known girl who I had never formally met until today. But if I didn't go through with this, consequences were bound to happen. So I did the only thing I could do. Smile. "Yes." I said, hoping I was deceiving both of them. "That is excellent news." I leaned towards Camille, lightly kissing both of her cheeks in a parting gesture. As I backed up, I bowed deeply, my black strands of hair touching the polished wood floors. "Thank you." I said very monotoned, and then I fled into the confines of my room, where I spent the rest of the night kicking stuff and throwing my pillow across the room. I look back on that memory now. I was such a child back then, and now I understood what my father wanted from me, though it wasn't the route I would have taken if I had a child.

My mother and I had a very close relationship. She was the one who understood what it was like to be different. Mama, that was what I called her as a child, and I still refer to her by that name, was an immigrant from Indonesia and she was picked on for having a foreign look about her. I can recall her features almost perfectly, though it has been years since I had last seen a picture of her. She had black hair, the color of the coal that we used to warm ourselves with. Dark eyes which were so kind and warm, unlike Sebastian's, those were cold and unforgiving and mocking. She was very skinny, even before the start of the war, and most of these things she had passed onto me. But I had my fathers eyes. Green mixed with gold.

In my younger years I remember her and I sitting at our grand dining room table, eating sweets and dinner, wasting the evening away with stories and fables. Father didn't come home until late, his work ran until about 4:30, and then he went into the synagogue to pray for an hour or two, depending on how stressed he was feeling. So it was natural that my mama raised me. I told her what was troubling me, because I knew I could trust her above anyone else in the world. "Friends are temporary, Magnus. But family is forever. Remember that." She would often remark. That statement has helped me with so many difficult choices that I had to make later on in life. I loved her more than anyone else in the world.

Mother accepted me for who I was. When I realized that I was a homosexual, she was the one who stood by me through it all, no matter what came our way. I admire her for that. She could've been like my father, cold and reclusive, barely acknowledging that his son existed. Our relationship had burned down into rubble, the daily conversations turning into: "Please pass the salt." I was even lucky if he said "How was your day?" But when I opened my mouth to speak, father would always just open up the newspaper and read about politics. Me being gay had shattered our link. He didn't love me so naturally, I didn't love him. There was no hope for my father and I. But me being attracted to men just made the bond between my mother and I even stronger.

And then there was the Nazis. I still shudder at the thought of some of the things that they did to the Jewish people who couldn't defend themselves. In one fell swoop, they had taken over Poland and took away any freedom and rights that I as a seventeen year old was just beginning to enjoy. 1939 felt promising to me, but it wasn't anymore. Soon after Poland had surrendered to Hitler's reign, the trouble began for any and all Jews in my fine and proud country. I was not allowed to go into the coffee shop I liked, or buy fabrics from the tailor down the street, for they all had the star of david with the word 'Jude' crudely painted in the middle. Our food rations got shorter and just when I thought it couldn't possibly get worse for the hebrews. It did.

Mama, father and I were moved into the Warsaw Ghetto almost immediately after the Germans took over. My father argued with the SS officers that his parents and their parents and their parents before them had lived here before he, and so we had a right to stay here in our home. I can recall much of that day.

"Out, dreckigen Jude!" An officer shouted, his tight jaw cold and cruel. Out filthy Jew. After all these years I still cannot figure out what my family did to deserve this. My mother and I celebrated Christmas for gods sake! You can't be any less Jewish than that!

"My family has lived here for four generations." My father said, standing in front of the door frame with his chest puffed out. He failed to look intimidating, because he had not had a proper meal in months because of the strict rations we had. I knew we had it better than most families, but I still complained often. "We are not leaving."

The officer motioned for the two guards behind in to grab my mother and I. We were escorted roughly out the door, our one suitcase in our dirty and grimy hands. Minutes later, the SS officer dragged a hysterical Jacob Bane out the door. He was kicking and flailing, ranting on and on about how Hitler was going to be our demise and that it was unjust and unfair to be treated like this. My father was a man of politics, and he despised Adolf Hitler. But what could he do? Nothing. No one could do anything about the steel fist that had gripped Europe. And then the shouting stopped, for the cruel german man had hit him in the head with the butt of his gun. Father dropped to the ground, and Mama screamed, her hands over her mouth. He wasn't moving, wasn't breathing. Father was dead.

As much as I hated my father, I was still deeply saddened by the loss. He had taught me to stand my ground, and to fight what I believed in. The rain from the greying sky poured down, mingling the red blood of my deceased father with the brown mud of the soil that I was raised on. My father was born here and he died here, just as he wished. I only wished I could do the same. Mama and I marched on. silently grieving for Jacob Bane, who I realized now only wanted to best for me. Sometimes something tragic had to happen for reality to shine through your childlike skull. Papa wanted me to succeed where he had failed. Knowing I could have been rich and happy being a rabbi, he wanted me to pursue that dream. But that was his dream. Not mine.

My mother did not look back at the house we had left for a ghetto. But I did. Coming to terms with the Nazis ruling wasn't easy for me, and I promised myself one last glance of the house that I had lived in since day one of my birth. I turned, the noisy wind and rain tossing my black hair in my face, somewhat obscuring my view. There was the garden where Mama and I picked flowers in the spring. The old and rotten wood of the tree house that I had used sat in the tree, threatening to fall over onto the mushy ground at any second. Then over the hills was a stream where Ragnor, Catrina, and I would wade our feet into on hot days in the summer. That brook, I decided, was where I would leave my childhood forever, letting the water wash the innocence of my young self. I snapped my head back forward, feeling my mother squeezing my hand in a reassuring manner. But I wasn't comforted. I never would be until this war was over, and my remaining family was safe in my arms.

* * *

**A/N: So ends the first chapter of 1940. I really don't have anything to say except: Screw you, Hitler. I really do not like that man. I don't like snicker's either... If you don't review, dead Jacob Bane will come and haunt you for all eternity! **

**Ave Atque Vale,**

**Wicked.**


	2. 2

**A/N: Don't you just love being sick? No, not mentally, I mean physically. Thats right, lovelies, Wicked is bedridden for the next 24 hours! Go ahead, cry or cheer at will. Thats good for you because I will have time to write 3 and maybe 4 of 1940. If you're reading the book and criticize me for getting the Jewish religion wrong, I really sincerely apologize! I don't mean to offend anyone, honestly I'm not that cruel. I'm Catholic, so I go to church on Sundays and not saturdays. I'm not Jewish, and I don't know anybody who is, so I can't really gather my information from anywhere except for books and movies. I don't trust the internet :/ anyways, I'll stop rambling and let you read 2. **

* * *

My mother and I were sandwiched in between two other Jewish families in the ghetto. One, the Lightwoods, took my particular interest. There was a mother named Maryse, a father Robert, and three children. Alexander, the oldest, Isabelle, the middle, and Maxwell, the youngest. They also had an adoptive child, Jace, but I didn't like him. I had seen them on my way to school and around town when I was with Catrina or Ragnor, but I'd never talked to them before. Actually, it was Alexander who I couldn't talk to. Usually, my flamboyant self could march right up to people, introduce myself, and within minutes have both men and women swooning in my arms, begging for more of myself. However, when it came to Alexander Lightwood, I felt a certain reluctance. My head was swimming when ever he came close, my heart thumping so wildly in my chest I was afraid it might burst. Mama had often spoke of love, and what it felt like, but until previously I had never experienced it.

Alexander had very good looks. Dark black hair and blue eyes the color of the sea when it was happy and bright and calm. His very defined features had me quivering like a child again. When he walked down the filthy street or down our rat infested hallway, he smiled at me. I just thought he was being friendly, but he was slowly returning my odd quirks of love. Soon. I told myself. Soon you will be able to talk to him like you do everyone else. Soon, you will be happy. I can still remember the first time we actually talked face to face, and not hid behind our parents forms out of embarrassment. I'm positive Alexander does too.

I was walking home from getting my daily rations of food. It was a cloudy day, much like the one where my father was beat to death. My stomach growled from malnourishment, but I had more food than others. Stumbling along the path wearily, I had failed to notice the SS officers headed down the same street. Everyone here knew the protocol. Men were to take off their hats and walk along in the gutter, letting their superiors point and laugh. We were allowed to do nothing, and most of us had just taken to walking the the streets, just to avoid the humiliation.

"Du da, Jude. Wo sind deine Manieren?" Their voices called out in perfect German. I looked at them through my long strands of black hair. Blue eyes, blond hair, both of them. The Aryan race. Hitler's desired race of humans. I didn't hate them, I couldn't. Half of them were brainwashed into believing that hebrews were nasty people who deserved to die because of their religion. It wasn't their fault they were like this. It was society's.

"S-Sorry." I stammered, stepping down into the slippery and wet puddles below. I bowed deeply, hoping they would do the usual thing: Laugh in my face, point, and walk off, chuckling more and more until they turned the corner to dehumanize another person of Jewish faith. Then they pushed me down, the bread I had carried all the way fell into the water or into the entrance of the sewers down below. Either way, it was inedible now. My hands and knees stung from where I caught myself as I crashed into the pavement. The Nazis kicked me, aiming blows at my stomach and more often than not hit their target. I willed myself not to scream out in pain. I wasn't going to let them be satisfied by my anguish. I bit my lip so hard it bled, leaving a long stream of red down my cheek.

"Das nächste Mal werde euch zu erinnern, in der Gosse, wo Sie hingehören bekommen, nicht wahr, dreckigen Jude?" One said finally, after kicking me particularly hard in the ribs. I think he relished the fact that I was writhing around in pain. I couldn't speak to the men, so I numbly nodded, the meager bread forgotten. When they walked away, I saw the people around me. My acquaintances, my neighbors, my teachers. They were just frozen, white faced, and for a moment I felt anger. They stood by while I was beaten? They didn't think to do anything? But the outrage did not last for long. I focused mainly on the wounds that the Nazis gave me. Bruises would form, purple, yellow and black, painting me a collage of fragileness.

Two sets of hands were on me, hauling me out of the dirty trough. They helped me stand after much trouble and I looked up. There stood Alexander and Isabelle Lightwood. Isabelle looked a lot like her older brother, but her eyes were dark instead of the stained glass blue I'd seen winking at me from the street corners. "Are you ok?" She asked, her irises showing genuine concern and worry.

I bowed my neck in response, noting how much pain it caused. I bent down to pick up the filthy loaf of bread, but Alexander put a firm but soft hand on my chest. "It isn't worth it. You'd get sick if you ate that. I'll give you my ration."

"Oh no," I said hurriedly. "You don't have to do that, my mother and I, we have enough food to last us the entire week." This, of course, was a lie. He didn't need to be giving me his food when his family was bigger and needed the extra grain. Still, Alexander handed me his bread, smiling with sympathy and compassion. His hands felt warm in mine, the cold wind chilling me to the bone.

"Even so, take it. We can manage without one loaf. Can't we, Izzy?" He said, pressing the grain further in my grasp and turning to his sister.

"Oh sure we can manage. If by manage you mean one of us will go hungry tonight-" Her words were cut off by Alexander elbowing her in the ribs, giving her a stern look. She looked at me and smiled again. "Yes. We'll be fine." Isabelle looked into the distance, waving to a mysterious person whom I didn't turn and look at because the pain was too much. "Excuse me. Simon's waiting for me. Bye Alec, don't wait up!" She kissed his cheek, gazed over him and I, and ran off in the street, twirling as she did so.

"Simon is Isabelle's boyfriend." Alexander explained as we stood on the sidewalk. I couldn't believe I was taking to the boy that I loved, and I didn't even know if he like me back. "Papa doesn't approve."

I could relate with him on that. My deceased father would have never liked my choice of men. He would rather me marry a nice Jewish girl and give him many grandsons and daughters. Seeing that he was already dead gave me a new sense of hope. I scolded myself mentally. I loved my father, I did. But I was not cut out to be a straight rabbi. "Mine didn't either." I say softly, looking at the grey bricks that made the pathway down the street and around the corner.

"Oh?" Said Alexander, raising an eyebrow. "Are you dating a girl who isn't worthy of the name 'Bane'?"

I smiled, dragging my feet as I did so. My whole body ached, and I wished at that moment that I could just sleep the pain away on the ground. It wasn't much different from my bed at home. "No, no. It's what I like, rather than who I like. And my father is dead, so I suppose it doesn't matter." I said, wrapping my arms around me.

"Ah. Sorry." He said. Our conversation came to a quick halt, but I liked Alexander's voice, so I didn't want the talking to end. I liked everything about the Lightwood next to me. He fascinated me immensely.

"It isn't like you were the one who killed him." I said. I noticed that I was about an inch taller than him. "You know my last name." I remarked. "How?"

"I do research on the people that I have a particular interest in. You're the first boy in a while I wasn't able to stay away from." Alexander answered like it was no big deal. "I know who your mother, Sarah is. I know who Jacob, your father was. And I also know that you sleep talk at about 1:30 a.m. without fail."

"Seems to me like you're stalking me." I smiled. But I wasn't in the least bit creeped out. Which was weird, because if anybody else did it, I'd probably get the police in the ghetto involved. With Alexander, it felt... Normal. I didn't know how to describe the feeling.

"If I stalk you then you stalk me. I've seen you looking at me from around corners and street lamps. You're just too scared to talk to me, aren't you?"

I sighed. "All my life, my father told me that being a homosexual is bad. He basically shunned me. I don't know how to act around you."

"Well you could just act like yourself. Thats what I usually do." Suggested Alexander. "By the way, call me Alec, everyone does."

Alec. It was short, sweet, and to the point. I loved it the moment I heard the name roll off the tongue. I liked it more than 'Magnus', which was an old name that nobody had. I looked at Alec and smiled the biggest that I had in the weeks that I had been in the ghetto. Nothing really made me happy. Mama and I rarely talked anymore, but it was because I worked all day. Sarah Bane was grief stricken, her husband cruelly taken away from her in an instant. I wasn't mad at her, I didn't have to heart to be. Every night, I heard her scream out 'Jacob.' again and again. Sometimes my name slipped into her nightmares and I wanted to go and wake her, but I knew that she needed her rest to gain the strength she needed to survive.

My job consisted of building the walls around the ghetto. It was hard, bone-breaking work, but I got paid with lunch everyday that I managed to get to the outskirts of town. I saw my old friends on the other side, and it was like they were brainwashed. Camille and Sebastian threw rocks at my head, calling me a 'dirty Jew.' Catrina just stood behind them, tears shining in her pale face. That was what probably hurt me the most. How could she just stand there doing nothing?

I realized that I had stayed silent for far too long. Alec was staring at me. "Sorry. I was thinking. Yeah, I will act like myself. I'm Magnus and I've got no nickname."

"No, you have a nickname. Everyone does." Alec said, and we continued walking. I smiled. It would be so easy to act like my magnificent self around him. He was so likeable, and I hoped I seemed the same in his eyes. I wasn't usually this insecure about myself, but under the circumstances, I pardoned this strange attitude that had clung onto me. Before I could answer him back, my legs gave way, fed up with the pain and the over use. I fell, clutching onto Alec's shoulders for support. "Whoa whoa whoa. Are you ok?" He asked me, concern flooding his baby blue eyes.

"Yeah." I said, trying to stand up again.

"No, you're not. Come on, I'll take you to my house where you can rest. Those Nazis hurt you pretty bad." Alec said, hooking his arm over my shoulder and helping me walk. I looked up at the side of his face, marveled at the way the grey light hit his chiseled features. I was so very grateful for the kindness he was showing me. Unlike so many of the people in the ghetto, who stole for a meager ounce of bread that wouldn't sustain them for the day, Alec was just helpful towards me. I've never forgotten that.

That was our first meeting, but it wasn't our last.

* * *

**A/N: If you want to figure out what the SS men are saying, use google translate. I used it and yeah... So I realized about halfway through the Malec moment that Magnus acts like Alec and Alec acts like Magnus. I wasn't going to go back and rewrite the entire conversation so I'll make sure to change their personalities in 3. SO DON'T BASH ME ON HOW I CAN'T WRITE CHARACTERS CAUSE I CAN OK? It's the trees I have problems with... - Ok Wicked you're obviously delirious, go to bed. **

**Ave Atque Vale,**

**Wicked. **


	3. 3

**A/N: Here is 3! I worked on it even though my father was yelling at me to clean and I'm like 'I'm sick dude I can't work' and he was like 'YOU SHALL WORK MUHAHAHAHA!' Yeah, not a good day... Anyways read and review, my healthy little shadowhunters!**

* * *

I managed to stifle my sharp inhale of breath as Alec and I made our way towards his small apartment. I prayed to God that Mama was still sleeping, or too deep in anguish to notice that her son was gone. Dragging my feet, I saw the men, women, and children open their doors and look at me with wide, frightened eyes. They knew what the Nazi's were capable of, but seeing me like this horrified them. I saw twins, one boy and one girl, each with dark hair and dark eyes, come up to me and tentatively poke me. If I wrote down that my body was on fire, which it was, that would not even begin to describe what the delicate half second connection felt like. I bit my lip, trying hard not to cry out. I knew the little ones did not mean to harm me, they were just curious. I smiled, though my green and gold eyes were watering.`

"Rebekah, Aaron." Their mother scolded. My stomach growled, calling to the attention that I had not eaten since yesterday morning. I leaned heavily on Alec, knowing that he wouldn't mind. Soon, we were at the door to his apartment that was next to mine. The entrance was white and splintery, the faint outlines of the numbers 217 still there. Alec knocked, once, twice, three times.

"Mama, Papa. It's Alec." He said breathlessly. Though I only weighed 176, starvation and loss of sleep had weakened Alec considerably. The door opened, and there stood a woman who looked exactly like Isabelle. I blinked, assuring myself that I was not seeing double. After further inspection, I noticed that Maryse had worry lines set into her brow and age lines that scored across her face. Her hair had multiple streaks of steely grey shooting across it like meteors streaking across the sky. She was wiping her hands on a ratty old towel, which didn't look very clean. When she saw me, she stepped back.

"Alexander. Who is this?" She asked, using one finger to lift my chin up, inspecting me. I groaned, but not loudly. The walls here were paper thin. My mother did not need to know what happened to me today, and I trusted the Lightwoods to keep a secret.

"Mama, Magnus Bane. Magnus, my mother." He hurriedly introduced us. Alec helped me inside, laying me on their couch, which was old and stained and smelled like mildew. I was so tall that my legs hung off of the arm-rest, my feet dangling in midair. "He's hurt really bad. Izzy and I found him on the street corner after some SS men beat him for not stepping in the gutter. It was really heroic if you ask me." I just stared at Alec. That wasn't how it happened at all! But I wasn't about to say anything as his mother nodded in approvement.

"He is your responsibility, Alec. Do with him what you will, but I can guarantee your father will not be happy in the slightest." With that, his mother lightly kissed him on the head, and went into the one bedroom. The apartments were impeccably small here in the ghettos. You had three room. One large one, that was to be used as your living room and kitchen. One small, that was your water closet. And one medium sized one, and that was made out to be your bedroom. Mama and I had it easy, there being only two of us and so we lived as comfortably as we could. But Alec's family had six people and they were cramped in here so tightly it looked like there wasn't any extra air. In the corner of the kitchen I saw two makeshift mattresses, and I concluded that Isabelle and Maryse slept there. This couch was clearly meant for someone much more smaller than I, so I inferred that Max crashed here overnight. That left Alec, Jace, and Robert for the main bedroom.

I was so deep in thought that I hadn't noticed my ebony haired companion gracefully slipping off my threadbare shirt. My foreign skin, which was usually clear of any and all impurities, was already showing signs of deep bruises that would quickly show up overnight. It reminded me of how quickly the Nazi's took over Poland, and it seemed the same amount of time. I winced as Alec poked and prodded my abdomen. I knew he was trying to be gentle, so I tried not to shy away from his touch.

"You'll live" He concluded, standing up. Slowly and painstakingly I lowered my shirt to cover my stomach.

I smirked thoughtfully, thinking of a comment that would ease the seriousness in the room. I couldn't think straight, not with Alec around. My head was dizzy with thoughts of him and I holding hands while walking down a street that was forbidden to Jews. I'd never been a rebellious child, but around Alec it felt okay to break the rules, even he himself didn't. "Well what about the wound on my lip?" I say, pointing to the tiny scratch that I had made myself. It had started to heal over, but it still throbbed. Alec, as if reading my mind, leaned forward, his eyes half closed. In this time of darkness, we were the ray of light that shone through. Our love could survive the war and I would make sure that it did. I'd already lost my father. I wasn't going to lose the man I love to the Nazis control.

Lifting my head a little, pain be damned, I forced my lips to touch his. This wasn't my first kiss, Camille and I shared some under the fog of a street lamp or outside her house, but I didn't enjoy it. Not like I did with Alec. With us, I felt like sparks flew, igniting our path right then and there. He tasted of sweat and the unsavory bread that we Jews ate to survive, mingled with some of my blood because the wound had reopened, allowing for fresh blood to flow in. It felt brief to me, and Alec had to end the kiss because he ran out of air. His cheeks were flushed a brilliant red and he smiled, licking his swollen lips. "It's fine." Alec said, his voice an octave higher than it usually was. "But if you ever need someone to take a look at it for you..."

"You'll be the first to know." I finish his sentence for him. Even I'm panting with exertion, and I've had longer kisses while dancing. Granted, I wasn't in such bad shape, but still. The discolored muscles around my stomach contract in pain from too much movement. I whimper in pain, turning my head away from Alec to face the wall.

"Stay still." Alec instructed. I barely nodded in acknowledgement. I heard him getting up and walk off, his footsteps getting lighter but never leaving my ears. I focused on my breathing, and somehow the cool, stale air froze the fire within me. My blue eyed love interest came back, tapping me lightly on the shoulder. I rolled to face him, pleasantly smiling.

"Couldn't stay away from me, huh?" I said. Alec's blue eyes were shining as he brought something to my lips.

"No, you're too magnificent. Now open up and let me feed you." I looked down into the spoon. There was clear yellow broth in it. I shook my head, but not because I wasn't I hungry. I was. I was starving. But his family of six needed it more than I did.

"I can't accept this, Alec. You'll go hungry tonight and I don't want to be the one that caused it." I look at the clock. It was almost curfew and if I didn't get inside my own home by the time the hands marked the cursed hour, I would surely pay for it somehow. The Nazi's didn't tolerate any stragglers on the streets and if they found you, you didn't live to see the morning. I sat up, ignoring the agony I was in. Alec pushed me down gently. "Come on. Let me up. My mother is probably worried sick and she'll go out looking for me." It wasn't a lie. After losing her husband, she kept her watchful eye on me every second she could. If the SS officers found her and did to her what they did to me, I'd be an orphan by morning's light. Alec sighed, giving up on nursing me and I heaved myself up, wobbling for a moment. I felt Alec's presence beside me, guiding me out of his home. "Thanks." I mumble gratefully. We stumble the few short feet to my door. I knocked feebly, knowing Mama was home.

"Magnus-" My mother said when she first opened the door. She stopped when she saw her only child, me, bent over with the help of a stranger that she didn't know. She went as pale as a sheet. Helping me to my bed, Alec explained who he was and what had happened. Mama fluttered other me constantly, never leaving my side and completely forgetting within five minutes the Alec Lightwood was in our home. He just sat on the edge of the mattress holding my hand. Not even friends for 24 hours and we were practically courting. Oh yeah, completely normal behavior for a homosexual couple in the 1940's I agree.

When the bell rang from outside, signaling that all Jews in the ghetto were to be inside their homes, I jerked my head towards the door, motioning with pleading eyes that Alec must get out of here. I wasn't going to be his cause of death. I'd already caused enough pain in his family, with taking the bread that he offered. I thought of his brother, Max, who'd be going hungry tonight because of me. Or maybe Max would be spared starvation. Maybe it would be Alec or Isabelle that would suffer until the morning. Either way, I wouldn't be able to eat that loaf of bread without knowing that the Lightwoods had sacrificed their well being for a complete stranger. Alec walked out of my home with one final glance my way, a sad smile plastered on his porcelain face.

When he left, Mama came to me. "You like that boy?" She whispered harshly, looking over her shoulder as if Hitler himself was lurking in the shadows. And impossible thought, he'd never come here for any reason other than to mock us, and even then we were not worth his time. I nodded in the darkness.

"He is a fine man, Mama." I answer her. "Alec gave me bread after what had happened even though I said we didn't need it. But he insisted. I didn't want to be rude so I took it. Then we were at his house and he tried to feed me some soup but I didn't take it. I didn't want his family to starve because of me." Tears poured down my face as I uttered my last sentence of the night. "Was that wrong of me, Mama?"

My eyelids dropped suddenly, and I realized how sleepy I was. My mother just held me, stroking my black locks of hair that were so much like her own. "No my son. You did the right thing." She whispered, kissing my troubled temple. With that message in mind, I closed my gold and green eyes and submitted to sleep, hoping my dreams would take me away from this nightmare and I could fantasize Alec and I eating in a dinner in Paris.

* * *

**A/N: What shall happen next?! Only the next update shall tell! More you review= more I update= more happy you as readers are! I won't update until I have 20 reviews, so tell all your friends about how wonderful I am!**

**Ave Atque Vale,**

**Wicked.**


	4. 4

**A/N: Hello there lovelies! How are you I haven't updated in forever! So I'm not sure when 5 will be up, but I know what happens so it is just a matter of finding the time and energy to write it. This is a VERY fluffy chapter because after this, things turn from bad to worse and everyone dies. Well not everyone, Chairman lives and thats important. Anyways, if you review it'll make me more happy and more apt to update! ENJOY!**

* * *

I woke up to the sound of children laughing. That made me smile, though my eyes were still closed. Smiling, unlike so many other things, didn't hurt. Moving hurt, breathing hurt, and even thinking some thoughts hurt, but grinning ear to ear didn't. It was rare to see children in the ghetto smiling and laughing and having a good time. The Nazi's forbid a lot of things, but playing with a ball of rags wasn't one of them. Some kids were so young that they didn't know what a movie theater was, or the smell of brand new textbooks. In that aspect, they were lucky. I, along with so many other teenagers, knew what those things were, as well as sweet smelling bread that wasn't infested with sawdust. My heart yearned to go ice-skating with Catrina and Ragnor again, and I felt a pang of homesickness, because even though this small apartment was now my dwelling, it didn't feel like it. This was not my home. Home was where my parents taught me to ride a bike. Where they tucked me into bed at night, or they got all choked up on my first day of school. This was not home. And it never would be.

I wondered how the Nazi's could do this to us, to the Jews, though some of us were not overly religious, like my family. That was the first time I remembered feeling actual hatred towards them. They treated us like we were some dirty animal that deserve to be branded and tortured. I pondered if Alec felt the same way I did, or if he was passive and went about his daily business as best he could, following rules and regulations. I wasn't a rebel as some were. I heard of some men wanting to start a revolution here in the Warsaw ghetto and they asked me if I would like to join them. I declined right away. I may not like what the Nazi's were doing to me, but I wasn't going to risk my life. I had my mother to think about, and Alec too.

The whistle blew for all men to go to work, I was no exception to that rule. I finally opened my eyes, looked at the cracked ceiling and wished that it would just collapse on me so I wouldn't have to go in. I then peered at my stomach and practically groaned. There was no more tan skin, only purple, yellow, black, and blue stains like some kind of morbid alien. It was going to be absolute hell to even walk across my hallway, let alone do eight to ten hours of back breaking work.

"Magnus," My mothers voice drifted from the kitchen. She walked in, and I realized this was the first time since we moved into the ghetto that she looked presentable. Her hair was in a tight bun, and she wore a plain dress that was too old and boring for an amazing woman like herself. After the war I would buy her all the latest styles from Paris and London and New York, because she deserved beautiful dresses. But that chance never came. Mama died before the war could end. "I don't want you to go to work today."

I almost laughed. "Mama don't be silly. I can work, I have to work. Who else is going to buy the bread and broth?" I pushed the covers off me, forcing myself to stand up and put a white linen shirt on.

"I can do that. You're just a child, you'll work yourself to death. I am your mother and I need to take care of you. If you stay here, I know you will be safe." Her dark wise eyes, lined with worry and age, pleaded with me.

The smile was gone off my face. I looked at my mother, very somber, and said: "Nowhere is safe Mama. Not here, not in England. The only safe place for Jews is 6 feet underground with a tombstone above us." The war had made me into a man too quickly, but what I said that day was true. Until the Nazis and Hitler were eradicated, there was no hope for the Hebrews.

Mother closed her eyes very tight. "Don't say that Magnus. Don't. There is always a safe place. There is always hope." Later, when I was in the work camps dying and starving, those words kept me from sending my soul to God. "Please stay here today, for me." She opened her eyes again, and I saw tears peaking out from the bottom of her eyelids, threatening to spill over her foreign face.

I sighed, leaning back into the uncomfortably thin mattress and pillow. I didn't like this plan. "Alright. For you." What if she got killed on the streets? What if the Nazis were mean to her? Well, they were mean to everybody no matter what, but my mother looked so different than the rest that I was afraid she'd be picked on the most.

She walked over a gave me a kiss on my forehead which was mixed with the saltiness of her tears. "Thank you my Son. I love you."

"I love you too." And then she left.

I didn't mind being alone. When I was in school, I was so absorbed in my studies and trying to create the latest fashion statement that I didn't even have friends. Sure, everyone thought I was cool and invited me to their parties, but they didn't know the first thing about me. I was a very sensitive boy, but incredibly protective to those I loved. I heard muffled shouting from the room over, the Lightwoods home. A dull slap followed and a girls scream. All at once, horrible images crossed my mind.

They've found out that Alec's homosexual. They're taking him away and I'll never see him again. They'll come for me soon enough. Just the thought of Alec being in a worse state than I was in right now was enough for me to curl my fists into cold balls of metallic fury. I didn't understand why we were being prosecuted. We were born homosexual, it wasn't a disease, and neither was Judaism. We were just scapegoats and nothing more. But when I listened into the shouting I found it wasn't a SS officer, as I had originally thought.

"Papa! Stop!" Cried a girls voice. That was Isabelle. Was her father hitting her? No, it wasn't right for a man to hit a girl.

"If I ever see you with that boy again Alexander so help me god I will kill you. Do you understand? I will not tolerate homosexuality under my household, and if that means I have to lose a son because of it, I'm fully prepared to take that risk." A furious man's voice yelled out. I could hear the conversations as clear as day. Alec's father was hitting his son because of me. I felt sick to my stomach, but I didn't throw up. How could a man hit his son? It was unnatural. My father may have not approved of me liking men, but he never once raised his hand towards me.

I couldn't hear Alec's response, but I did pick up a door being pulled open and then slammed shut, making me jump, not out of fear, but out of guilt. I couldn't help but feel somewhat responsible about what happened between Alec and his father, Robert. A rapping came at my entrance door, and I was afraid that it was the SS men, coming to take me away because I was of no use to them so therefore they'd deportieren or deport me. But the tapping was slow, sorrowful, and hesitant. I knew who it was right away. "Come in." I said, swallowing hard, trying to force the regret down my throat.

"Magnus?" Alec said, sniffing. I could tell he was crying without even looking at him. I called him over to me, since I was bedridden for god knows how long, so I couldn't get up and give him a tour. When he was directed to my bedside, he knelt before me, sobbing. He put his head on my chest, and I tensed up, preparing myself for the pain. I stroked his ebony hair, just as my mother had done for me when I was sick and alone, and afraid.

"Shh. Shh. It's ok Alexander." I murmur into his hair. I only want to make him feel safe and secure in my arms. I want him to realize that if he's with me, no harm will come to him because I will protect him. Because I love my darling Alexander. Some people don't believe in love at first sight. But I do. I know it's real because I found my true love in the form of a black haired, blue eyed angel named Alec Lightwood.

"Don't call me that." Alec said. "My father calls me that when he's disappointed in me. Just call me Alec." He sobbed harder, balling up the now wrinkled and water-stained white shirt that I wore and didn't have the good grace to button up. I didn't care, as long as it made Alec feel better. It probably didn't though.

"Did he hit you darling?" I ask, gently tilting his face towards mine. There, on Alec's cheek, was a clear red mark, courtesy of Robert Lightwood. I leaned forward and kissed each feverish fingertips on his high cheekbones. When Alec was around, I noticed my pain tolerance was higher than normal, and I could withstand much much more.

"He struck me because he found out you were here yesterday and that we kissed. Isabelle tried to stop him, but father just shooed her away like a common housefly."

"Oh god, Alec. I'm sorry. I'll understand if you're angry with me and never want to see me again." I say, wrapping my arms around his hunched over figure. I wanted what he wanted. Craved what he craved. I loved him, though I wasn't about to say it right now when I was the cause for all the pain that he had, emotionally and physically.

"Don't be, Magnus. He just doesn't understand. Being a homosexual isn't something you or I can change about ourselves. It's who we are. I just don't think I'm ready for the rest of the world to know." Alec said, curving into my bent and battered touch. "Of course I want to see you again are you crazy? You must be. You're my own personal sun in this world of darkness. Without you I'm just like those rumored people in Auschwitz. Dead. Or maybe just a walking soulless skeleton." My god this boy was amazing.

"Do you wanna go outside? I think It'd be much better out there than in here, where the walls are paper thin." I know that Robert was probably listening in, and I didn't want him to. This conversation that I was having was private, and I would make it so. When I felt Alec nod, I freed him from my tangled arms. As he helped me up, I realized that my legs shook with exhaustion from renewal overnight. Alec grabbed my hand to steady me and then we made it across my apartment and down the stairs to the confined outside world.

The Warsaw ghetto was small, less than 5 percent the square footage of Warsaw, the city that I was born and bred into. There was a wall separating me from my city. The wall was tall, gloomy, and grey. Once you were in there was no going out. Some night on my way home from work , I'd see boys no older than nine or ten crawl through cracks and crevices. One boy didn't make it. He was beat to death on the other side. Apartments were so close to each other, you could stand right in the middle of two, stuck your arm out, and touch both housing units without extending your limb all the way out. It was horribly crowded, as there were lots of Jews from around the Nazi occupied Europe. I could barely see the sky anymore, the buildings and the 9 foot wall obscuring my view from the blue and white. Sometimes I would dream that I had wings, and then I'd fly away from all this hatred and death and be one with the sky. But I always woke up, and inside I died a little everyday knowing I could never truly be free with the wall blocking me.

Soon Alec and I had found a spot in an alleyway that seemed to be deserted. It was the last building on this side of the ghetto, and instead of a stony barricade, there was a wire fence, frosted on top with mocking barb wire. Barely anybody came over to this side, so I knew it was safe.

"What do you wanna do when the war ends?" Alec asked me, leaning against the dull building and crossing his arms over his chest. I noticed the armband and the yellow JUDE star on his shirt that all of us here in the ghetto were supposed to wear. I even wore it, though it clashed horribly with my complexion.

"Me?" I scoff. I didn't believe the war would end. It would just keep going and going until humanity killed itself and a new mutant species thrived. "I want to help people. Not like a doctor, I can't heal, but more like a... Social worker of some kind." I smile longingly and think of the life I could've had, were it not for my current situation. I knew right then and there that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Alec. I needed his strength. If I couldn't have my angel, there was no path ahead that wouldn't lead into destruction for me. I completed Alec and Alec completed me.

"Well I want to become a lawyer. I didn't before but I do now." Alec said, wrapping his arms around my waist. My arms encompassed his waist, and we were so close I could feel his breath mingling with mine. The wind ruffled our hair, our clothes, almost making us one. "The way we're treated, I want to make sure no one experiences this type of thing as long as I'm still breathing. Which may not be for very long."

"Hey," I say, lifting his chin up with one of my long fingers. At one time they were adorned by all kinds of rings in a vibrant shade of color, but now they were bare and had a fair amount of dirt on them. "Don't talk like that, okay? There is always hope." I repeated what my mother had said earlier. Her words had not yet swayed me, but maybe Alec would believe me. I hoped he would. Without hope, without love, you were nothing. I lean in, finally allowing myself the pleasure of kissing Alec again. He tasted the same as he did yesterday, minus the blood of my lips.

Something hard was being thrown at my head from the right side. It seemed the universe did not want two Jewish boys kissing, and I felt a surge of anger as I pulled away from my darling Alexander. "You stupid, dirty Jew!" A male voice called. I knew it at once. Sebastian Morgenstern, the Catholic boy who bullied me even before the Nazi's took over. He pelted rocks at me, and I instinctively ducked, clutching my sides and willing myself not to fall to the ground and cry out in pain. The shower of rocks still came.

"Leave him alone!" Yelled Alec protectively. Something horrible was going to happen, I could feel it in my bones. Just as I had descended, I arose again, putting a hand on Alec's shoulder, stopping him from taking the step towards further persecution. Sebastian aimed a stone at Alec, hitting him in the shoulder where a large puff of dust came up from his grey jacket.

"Don't." I whispers steadily in his ear. "Whatever you're thinking of doing, don't do it. He isn't worth it." I could feel Alec breathing furiously beside me. "You'll get in trouble and it won't be pretty like I am. It'll be about as pretty as that ugly brute on the other side of the fence." At this, Alec form, which was previously tensed, relaxed.

"You're right. C'mon, lets go." Alec grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the alleyway, away from Sebastian and the rocks, away from the closest freedom I would ever know for the next five years.

We kept walking, Alec and I. I could've sworn out of the corner of my eye, that Alec had turned around and stuck his pale pink tongue out at the Aryan boy. I had to refrain myself from laughing in what seemed like decades.

* * *

**A/N: So I hope you'll forgive me for the hiatus of this story, and I'm sorry to say that it will be continued. I'm not quitting on it like I did Paralyzed. I hope to have this done by Halloween or Thanksgiving (Thats Thursday, November 28th for all you non-americans.) so we'll see how far 1940 is then, okay? Okay. I'd like to thank everyone who is so understanding of my absence because I know how much you all love this story and I don't want to let you down. **

**Ave Atque Vale, **

**Wicked. **


	5. 5

**A/N: YAY I FINALLY DID IT! This was going to originally have a lot more action in it, but I shortened the chapter because if I had gone with my first plan, it would've been like 7 thousand words or something and it would've taken me another week. So here you go! Enjoy!**

* * *

It had been three years since I moved into the Warsaw ghetto. I had seen countless people, strangers, 2nd cousins, friends, enemies, being torn away from their families. Babies were being ripped away from a mother's protective breast, and placed on carts that looked like they would fall apart the moment the engine roared. Little children, no more than 8, would laugh and scream with joy, convinced that they were going somewhere happy, somewhere where they could finally live their childhood without fears of being beaten. I knew, along with everyone else who stayed, that they were being sent to Auschwitz, or a mobile killing unit. I saw young women tear their hair out in despair, crying out their babies names, knowing that would be the last time they'd ever see their little ones again. It made me sick.

Still, I was never auctioned for a deportation. Maybe it was because I was still of some use to the Nazi's, since I was able to work again. Yes, I had healed, the only permanent wound was a slight limp in my left leg. Then all of the sudden, the biannual ceremony of deportations stopped. Four months, everything was quiet, and a spark of hope flared up in my twenty year old chest. Had the war ended? Were we, the oppressed, free? Alec and I celebrated on my birthday, two months into the dormant Nazi rule. I had gotten an orange, something I hadn't seen in years.

"How much did this cost you?" I ask, knowing that this was a big deal and probably made Alec poorer than he already was. I held the precious fruit in my hands delicately, not daring to believe it was real.

"Doesn't matter." He said, shrugging off the threadbare coat he wore everyday. Rations were getting thinner and thinner every day. Instead of one loaf of bread you got a half. Instead of two bowls of broth you got one cup. How he managed to get this measly ball of fruit I would never know. "It's your birthday. Enjoy it." And with that, I knew I had to drop the subject because if I didn't the fight between us wouldn't end well. So I ate the orange, but not without a pit of guilt settling in my stomach for every bite I took.

My mother had taken up working full time, though I warned her not too. She said it helped take her mind off my father and the things that had happened to us as a family. Today was no different, as my birthday this year was on a wednesday, and it was hard to get time off as it was. I knew that mama wanted to be with me on my birthday, but I told her that her supplying for the both of us was more important, so now it was just Alec and I in my small and cramped apartment.

We sat in utter and complete silence for a while, alone with our thoughts. We had seen so much here in the ghettos and being homosexuals we were part of the daily beatings. See, the Nazi's thought that being homosexual was a disease, and they made us work harder and hit us more than any other person. They were trying to beat homosexuality out of us, but it didn't work. It only made my love for Alec stronger. The Nazi's took everything from me. My father, my mother's happiness, my home. But they couldn't take away my feelings or my morals as a human.

I peered at myself through a sliver of a mirror to my right. No longer did I have a joyous gleam in my eyes, or a crooked smile to match my charming personality. My hair had grown out longer, and I brushed it until the black crown around my head was silky smooth. Though my irises were as bright as ever, they had seen starvation and horror from the Nazi's rule. But now as I sat here with Alec by my side on my birthday, I felt safe. I felt like nothing could harm me on this day. But of course that was a stupid thought. The Nazi's could barge in here and take me and there would be nothing I or anyone else could do about it.

"Max has been getting sicker." Alec said, breaking the eery silence between us. Alexander's little brother Maxwell, had come down with typhus days earlier. The outlook was not good, and I knew that the Lightwoods were going to sit shiva soon enough. Still, I put my golden hand on Alec's leg.

"He'll be okay." I assured him, looking him in the eyes and smiling, hoping he'd believe me, for his sake. "Max is a strong kid. He'll pull through. You'll see." I could see tears forming in the blue irises. Tears of grief and sorrow and loss.

"I know." He answered, looking down and sighing heavily. I didn't know what it felt like to have a younger sibling. Mama had many miscarriages before and after I was born, and she was too old and to beat down to try again. Plus her husband was dead. Then we didn't talk again. Things weren't awkward between us, but I just felt really uneasy. Not just because of the orange, but because of the Nazis not doing anything.

A tentative knock on the door came next. The wood creaked on it's hinges, worn with age. Ragnor Fell, with his olive skin and dark hair walked in, his face dark and serious. I hadn't seen my friend in weeks, mainly because of work issues. It was extremely hard to get work in the ghetto, most grown adults unemployed. Unemployment meant no food for your family and more often than not I saw starving, dying children on the streets, their thin and brittle legs hiked up to their chest, begging to die or to be taken pity on. Ragnor, Alec, and I were lucky. I worked from sunup to sundown as did my co-workers. Ragnor and Alec did the same, and our work schedules often clashed. It didn't help that Ragnor lived on the other side of the ghetto.

"Happy birthday, Magnus." Ragnor commented, no happiness whatsoever in his tone of voice. I acknowledged this statement by silently nodding my head.

"It would be happy if I wasn't in here." I remarked, leaning back in the creaky rotten wooden chair and gesturing with my hands all around me. "When I'm out of the ghetto and finally free, the first thing I'm going to do is throw a big party for all my friends." There would be live music and dances and people serving us. It would be magnificent and afterwards my party would be talked about by my guests for the rest of their numbered days. I watched as Ragnor pulled up a chair and sat by Alec and I, forming a triangle.

We had a lot in common, Ragnor and I. Both coming from wealthy families, we didn't know what hunger was until now. I was an only child, and he was an only child. We both loved to have a good time with our friends and our parties usually started after school somewhere quiet and reserved, and they ended well into the next morning where we went home, trying to sober up before we collapsed on the front door steps of our houses, where our mothers would beat our hides raw if they saw us drunk as mice. If you looked closely, minus our skin tones, Ragnor and I could be mistaken for brothers. We both had sharp features, though he had dark stubble along his jawline where his teeth were set in aggravation. The only difference between us was I got all the women (Which I didn't want nor did I need.) and Ragnor came up empty handed. He was very jealous of me because of this.

"The Nazi's are taking people again." Alec said faintly, his voice a million miles away. I hadn't seen my boyfriend rise and look out the window, one hand pulling back the motheaten drapes, the other on his hip, bent at a perfect 90 angel. "You can tell. They've got the trucks lined up and everything this time."

I turned to Ragnor. "Not to be rude or anything, but why are you here?"

He looked at me, his dark eyes searching my extravagant ones. "Didn't I tell you? My parents were taken away months ago. It's been just me and I knew that sometime the Nazi's would come and take me away, just as they did Tateh and Mameh." Ragnor spoke Yiddish around his parents, because they had failed to speak English and be bilingual. The Jewish boy next to me could speak three languages fluently: Yiddish, English, and German. Ragnor was a smart boy. Smarter than I was, but he was less magnificent. "I wanted to spend time with someone who I know cared about me. And since I have failed to get a girlfriend, my best friend is a good second." He said.

"Nice to know I rank next to women." I say, smiling. "What do they have that I don't have?"

"You don't have breasts!" Grinned Ragnor. I didn't know why girls didn't like him, he was very handsome and charming towards them. Maybe it was because his fingers were odd. As a child, he was born with only four fingers on his left hand and then when he was five his hand got caught in a machine of some sort, where his fingers were gnarled and mangled even more. Minus a few deep white scars, you couldn't tell that that was from an accident.

Alec came to sit on my lap, cold fear pictured in his blue irises. His eyes were so odd, not exactly blue, but not close enough to violet to be considered purple. They were mysterious and very readable, but I loved them all the same. "What if they come for us?" He asked, very afraid.

"Alec, darling," I said, stroking down his wild black mane that sat atop his head like a crown. Unlike me, who takes time and care into their appearance each and every day, Alec just woke up and got dressed in old drabby, mostly moth eaten clothes. I'd tried to get him to change that but he wouldn't so I got him a blue scarf that matched his eyes for hanukkah last year. Alec still wore it whenever he went out in public for two reason: Because he loved it and because he needed to hide the hickeys that I gave him during the nights when we were together. Alec was bothered when I did it, saying people would notice. I merely nodded and said then they would know that you are mine. That seemed to make him happy or embarrassed, one of the two, because Alec blushed a cherry red. "don't worry about the Nazi's right now. Don't worry about what is outside this apartment window. If they do come for us, we can leave this place with a few happy memories. Just think of something else and whatever happens happens. I love you, and you know that. I love you and I will always protect you."

My answer seemed to please him because Alec mumbled 'okay' and nuzzled his face into my neck. I sighed, the conversation Ragnor and I were having was now stale and cold and it flew away with the birds on the wind. Right now I wished I was a bird, because then I could fly away from the horror of the ghetto. Little did I know things were going to get a lot worse than they already were.

**Duh duh DUH! CLIFFHANGER NOOO! Yes a cliffhanger, I love them :3. Cliffhangers are my best friend! Anyways, keep a look out for new chapters. I think I'll update once a week. My pattern will go: 1940, oneshot, 1940, oneshot, 1940, oneshot ect. Okay REVIEW OR DIE! Bye. **

**Ave Atque Vale,**

**Wicked. **


	6. 6

**A/N: I promised 1940, and I actually completed it on time this week, so kudos for me. Show your appreciation with a review why don't you? Alright so I know exactly whats going to happen for the rest of the story because I outlined it this week. I can tell you that there will be 20 something chapters and an epilogue. BE PREPARED FOR HEARTBEAK AND MALEC FEELS. That is all I will tell you. Mkay have fun reading lovelies!**

* * *

Ragnor, Alec and I sat conversing for a while, talking about the little things in life. It was amazing how much we had grown as men the past few years in the ghetto. I remembered the stream back at my house, the one where I had dropped my childhood in. If it had tagged along, it surely wouldn't have survived, and neither would I. Now I was a serious man who knew the cruelties of the world, because I was a victim of those cruelties. I noticed how thin we had gotten and how unshaven we all looked. If we had gone outside today just as we were, people would look at us and think we were rabid animals who didn't know what a bath or shower was.

But a solemn tone soon took over all three of us after gunshots and screams reached our ears. No longer were we laughing. No longer were we smiling. There was nothing funny or happy about people being murdered and we all knew it. After minutes of it being deathly quiet, Ragnor opened his mouth.

'I heard rumors. People, they go to a camp, and they're told they are going to take a shower. So they strip down and they enter a chamber, but they never come out." I looked at him, horror and shock filled my mind. "They're murdered. That's what is going to happen to us. I just know it." My mouth was open. I knew the Nazi's were cruel and I knew all about the labor camps but this couldn't be true. It just couldn't. I wanted to speak, but words had failed me. I felt like I was going to be sick.

"Shut up." Said Alec quietly. All this time he had been sitting on my lap with his ear right where my heart was to hear my heartbeat. But at this time he got up, tears streaking down his pale face. "These walls are paper thin and my little brother is in that room" Alec pointed to the left side of the wall. "he can hear everything we say, did you know that? Do you want to scare him, because thats what you're doing, saying stuff like that."

It was normal to be protective of those you loved, I knew that. I try my hardest to keep Mama and Alec safe and close to me because if they leave I will be nothing but a broken soul like Ragnor. I know he has lost hope, even the jokes he tells have lost the light and happiness they once held. I felt a surge of pride for Alec, because he was standing up for him and Max. And he was absolutely right. A twelve year old should not hear such things.

"Besides," Alec continued, running his hands through his black hair. "they are rumors, nothing more." It sounded like he was giving hope to himself, just as I was doing.

"Oh?" Said Ragnor, crossing his legs and arms and raising a dark brown eyebrow. "And you don't believe these rumors to be true?"

"How can they?" I say. Friendship be damned, no one talked to my boyfriend like that. No one dared challenged him while I was around. Alec, to me, was fragile and needed to be shielded. "If people go in there and never return, how can they tell others about it?" Ragnor, it seemed, was at a loss for words, his mouth opening and shutting like a fish that gasps for water in a world full of air. If those rumors were true, I thought that was what the dying looked like. Fish out of water. But I was wrong. I had heard those people scream and cry for help later, and they did not die quietly. The only time when it was silent was when they had all died and dropped to the floor like stones.

Alec came back to me and I wrapped his arms around him comfortingly, whispering empty promises I knew could never come true. I promised we'd never be separated. How could I guarantee that when my own fate was no longer in my hands? I could be lead away like cattle and never be seen or heard from again. I promised him that we would survive this. Again, that reassurance was nothing. But it didn't matter. It made Alec feel better and thats what mattered to me now. Just making him happy was worth every fight, every battle that I went through each and everyday. Just to see Alec's smile was enough for me to die happily.

I tightly shut my eyes, willing my own tears not to come. The dreams I had about Alec and I, the ones where we had breakfast in Paris and then lunch in America, those were shattered. I knew they were just daydreams of mine, but it hurt to see them so real, so vivid in my young adult mind. I heard a door shut quietly, announcing Ragnor's departure from my apartment. I rocked my boyfriend and I back and forth. The screams of oppressed people screaming and ringing in my ears. The shouts of the German soldiers overlapping them all. I shut my ears off from the world, detaching them from the outside where I knew everything was far from over, as I had hoped.

There was that word again. Hope. The thing that I had wished for had shattered inside of me, turning hope into a million shards of despair and depression that I could never sweep up until much later in my life. I knew that being free was too good to be true. The Nazi's would never be relentless and they would stop at nothing until we were killed. A knock on the wooden door, hard, sharp, and menacing. Voices that I didn't want to hear, not now anyways. "Out!" A man's call sounded. Instructions to pack only a suitcase of clothes and personal possessions followed, including a final statement of getting to the boarding station. We had but five minutes.

What could we do but follow orders? If we didn't, we would be killed so as much as I hated myself for doing this, I had to shove Alec off of me. With silent nods and looks of understanding, we packed. I headed for the room that I shared with Mama. I took one last glance at the lumpy bed that I had slept on for almost four years now. At first it was uncomfortable, but I had gotten used to it over time. Now I was leaving it for someplace unknown. I had a feeling deep in my gut that Ragnor was right, and that all the Jews in the ghetto were heading towards their death.

"Magnus?" Alec asked, trailing in behind me. His blue eyes which had once held so much light were now cracked and broken, and everything was to blame because of this.

"Yes?" I ask, neatly folding my clothes into a small bag. On top of my dresser sat a picture of Mama and another of Alec, I took them out of the frames and hid them under the sleeve of my jacket. I could lose clothes. I could lose money. But I couldn't lose those, they were much too precious to me, but not as much as the real people.

"I- I don't have any clothes and I can't go back home." He said, obviously ashamed of that sentence. I didn't know why. Alec was caught off guard, there was no shame in that. I turned to him, my hands still on top of the suitcase I was packing.

"That's alright, Alec." I say, grinning as happily as I can. "You can borrow mine."

But my boyfriend shook his head quickly. "No no no. I can't do that Magnus. You've done so much for me and I've done so little for you. Besides, you need all the clothes you can get. Who knows how cold it'll get-" He was quickly shut up by me pressing my lips to his. As I closed my eyes, Alec leaned into the kiss, melting at my touch. I loved that I could do that to him, make him melt like butter. No one was under my spell like he was and it was cute.

"I don't care." I said once we pulled apart moments later. I tucked a strand of black hair behind Alec's pale ear. "If you don't take some you'll freeze easily and I'll be responsible for your death. Now come on, help me pack." Slowly, Alec smiled and started to fold shirts cleanly and methodically. There was no use fighting about the subject. I was stubborn and very unlikely to change my mind. Luckily my boyfriend was compatible and didn't mind doing what I asked if it was for a good cause.

The five measly minutes we were given to pack and collect our belongings went by much too fast. It was gone in a blink of an eye and suddenly as I stepped out of my room for the very last time, I knew that my life had changed forever. My whole entire perspective had been whacked out of proportion and it would never be the same again. I turned to Alec. "I don't think I can do this, Alexander." I whisper, forgetting not to use his full name. But my boyfriend didn't flinch at his name.

"You have too. We all have too. We don't have a choice." He sighed, grabbing my hand and hauling me out the door. He was positively correct, just as he always was. I was faced with a mass of Jews standing outside our apartment, waiting to move out of the building just as Alec and I were. The children who were not taken away were holding their mothers hands. They were so small, I wondered how they did not get trampled on a daily basis by people such as myself. We all may have come from different backgrounds of heritage. Polish, German, Romani, Slavs, Freemasons, but we all had one thing in common: Starvation. It was a dog eat dog world out here. I even saw people eating infected food off the floor.

I scanned my eyes over the mass of people for any sign of a person I might know. No such luck. Me and Alec's hands were still entwined as we walked outside into the wintery atmosphere. The sun, though its rays were weak, still blinded me and gave me a sharp second long headache. The glare covered my sight for a moment and I stumbled on the steps, only to be shoved up by SS guards who stood watch, making sure not one dazed and confused Jew stepped out of line. Alec tried to help me up, but they shoved him away harshly, content on beating me up for falling.

As we turned a corner, a pale hand shot out and grabbed the collar of my frayed jacket. I refrained from shouting in surprise, knowing it would only cause more trouble. God knows I didn't want that. The force had also managed to pull Alec in the alleyway beside me. Before me stood Isabelle, Alec's little sister and certainly a force to be reckoned with. Though we all starved, she looked the most healthy. Alec I had seen deteriorate rapidly, his cheeks had become dull and had lost their rosy shine. His blue eyes were big in his sunken eyelids. Isabelle on the other hand still had the red lust on her cheeks, though it wasn't bright like a cherry was. And her deep brown eyes still were full and focused, as if she had never known fatigue and hunger.

Brother and sister embraced, whispering things that I couldn't hear or couldn't understand. The pulled apart and I saw that Isabelle's face was glistening with fresh tears. She turned to me, wiping a stray drop of water off of her face. I could see why Simon would like her. "Magnus. Alec has agreed to joining the Warsaw ghetto uprising. I know it is short notice but do you want to join?" She looked at me expectantly hoping I would say yes.

But the thing was, I couldn't. I wasn't the aggressive type. If it wasn't for Alec and the fact that he needed me, I would have taken my mother and hid underground until this whole thing blew over. I had to do what was best for Alec, not for me. In this world, I didn't matter, who I loved did.

I knew that either way Alec would probably die. If he went with me he would die. If he stayed with Isabelle he would die. I could go with him and make his last moments memorable and more enjoyable than if he was all alone. How he died was basically in my hands now. I had to make the right decision and fast. The only outcome I knew was that I was never, after this point in my life, going to see Alexander Lightwood again.

* * *

**A/N: Please don't throw rotten tomatoes at me because I did a cliffhanger. I love them as an author and it keeps my readers anticipating the next chapter verses a filler or fluff one. I was really tired when I wrote the last 8 chapters. High School can take so much out of you. I'm going to see Les Mis with my friend Moony tomorrow so that'll be fun and it'll give me more Malec plots to write. Okay see you next week shadowhunters! REVIEW!**

**Ave Atque Vale, **

**Wicked. **


End file.
